Oh, but I was doing it entirely for myself, for my own pleasure from the trip.
When I have trouble doing something, I tend to look for things that I do rarely, or even slightly shouldn't be doing but allow myself once in a while, and I go, "When I finish this [unpleasant thing], I will [do/take a little of the pleasant thing]".
About being in control... when I think of things deeply, I know that I almost always have the control to pull back, to give up. Of course, with some things it means loss of face, of prestige, but... I can do it. There are points of no return, of course, but they are oh so rare... and it's usually on things one either does want a lot, or just can't help. With everyday stuff...
Like a course in French. With the exception of losing money, withdrawing from it at any point should not be a problem.
The other thing is, not all things I need motivation on are created equal. Some take just a tiny nudge. Some need my taking the time to think through _why_ I have such internal resistance to doing the d*mned thing...
(I seem to have trouble posting this as a reply to your comment, so I'll just stick it to the main entry)
no subject
When I have trouble doing something, I tend to look for things that I do rarely, or even slightly shouldn't be doing but allow myself once in a while, and I go, "When I finish this [unpleasant thing], I will [do/take a little of the pleasant thing]".
About being in control... when I think of things deeply, I know that I almost always have the control to pull back, to give up. Of course, with some things it means loss of face, of prestige, but... I can do it. There are points of no return, of course, but they are oh so rare... and it's usually on things one either does want a lot, or just can't help. With everyday stuff...
Like a course in French. With the exception of losing money, withdrawing from it at any point should not be a problem.
The other thing is, not all things I need motivation on are created equal. Some take just a tiny nudge. Some need my taking the time to think through _why_ I have such internal resistance to doing the d*mned thing...
(I seem to have trouble posting this as a reply to your comment, so I'll just stick it to the main entry)