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Friends are fab
Apr. 17th, 2005 09:36 pmAnd not just in the sense of being fun to be around, and laughing with, and drinking wine, and talking bullshit... They are fantastic in the sense of keeping you out of your own arse.
I've been feeling fairly blah in the last few weeks, and went to see my SOBNQEG today (and the baby, but of course that was incidental). So, I was sitting there, bitching away, saying that I feel like I'm having an early mid-life crisis. She goes, "Why?" And I continue moaning on about how I'm horribly in debt, I don't have any assets whatsoever (other than a bed, some books, an old car and a stereo), I miss my other friends, I don't know if I'll ever earn enough to be comfortable when I'm old and whine whine grizzle.
She got that "you've got to be joking" expression on her face and said, "You've got your health, you have a great job that's enabling you to pay off this debt, you've got your independence [important point, coming from a mother of three and wife of two], you've had the opportunity to travel around the world. AND?"
So, I half-heartedly tried to grizzle a bit more, and after a couple more minutes, gave it up as a bad job. Because, of course, she's right. I mean, it isn't stuff I hadn't been telling myself anyway, but having it from the third-person perspective (from someone I respect) makes a difference.
I've also decided that my best and truest friends are the ones who will tell me to get my shit together, in precisely those words if necessary. Also, a relationship won't work out for me if my lover won't give me a good (verbal and deserved) slapping occasionally either -- funny that, since I thought I would be more the sort of person who doesn't like being challenged too much. But it's good, at the appropriate intervals. Of course, a friend of mine who was BDSMishly-inclined said that is a typical butch-bottom attitude. I laugh (hollowly) at her.
Anyways, babe, if you read this, thank you.
And for all my other friends, who have each performed the "get-over-it!" manoeuvre in your sundry ways, thank you too. I'll bring the wine next time. :-)
I've been feeling fairly blah in the last few weeks, and went to see my SOBNQEG today (and the baby, but of course that was incidental). So, I was sitting there, bitching away, saying that I feel like I'm having an early mid-life crisis. She goes, "Why?" And I continue moaning on about how I'm horribly in debt, I don't have any assets whatsoever (other than a bed, some books, an old car and a stereo), I miss my other friends, I don't know if I'll ever earn enough to be comfortable when I'm old and whine whine grizzle.
She got that "you've got to be joking" expression on her face and said, "You've got your health, you have a great job that's enabling you to pay off this debt, you've got your independence [important point, coming from a mother of three and wife of two], you've had the opportunity to travel around the world. AND?"
So, I half-heartedly tried to grizzle a bit more, and after a couple more minutes, gave it up as a bad job. Because, of course, she's right. I mean, it isn't stuff I hadn't been telling myself anyway, but having it from the third-person perspective (from someone I respect) makes a difference.
I've also decided that my best and truest friends are the ones who will tell me to get my shit together, in precisely those words if necessary. Also, a relationship won't work out for me if my lover won't give me a good (verbal and deserved) slapping occasionally either -- funny that, since I thought I would be more the sort of person who doesn't like being challenged too much. But it's good, at the appropriate intervals. Of course, a friend of mine who was BDSMishly-inclined said that is a typical butch-bottom attitude. I laugh (hollowly) at her.
Anyways, babe, if you read this, thank you.
And for all my other friends, who have each performed the "get-over-it!" manoeuvre in your sundry ways, thank you too. I'll bring the wine next time. :-)
