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Martian antennae time
Jan. 18th, 2009 07:04 pmJust because you're poly, it does not make you a speshul snowflake. All relationships require negotiation, all relationships should have a reasonably clear set of expectations. All the people you deal with deserve respect and consideration.
Like any other relationship, there will be conflicts because of misunderstandings (or acting out). Issues like one person getting upset when "check in with me when you shag someone new" was done after the event rather than before are not that different to one person getting upset because "a few drinks after work" should not imply rolling in at 3am completely drunk.
Ok, poly gives you a few new and creative ways to misunderstand and cock up - or be malicious and cause drama - but strictly mono couples still manage to have very similar issues.
If anyone's been following the recent discussion on the Polyamory comm, am I barking up the wrong tree? What is it about "I prefer open/multiple relationships" that newbies need educating about (according to some)? (Ok, if you're into orgies, there's some etiquette there.) Is it because some people are so immersed in their alt.sex environment that they forget that these kinds of issues are well-nigh universal? Or is there some glaring point of difference that I'm missing?
Like any other relationship, there will be conflicts because of misunderstandings (or acting out). Issues like one person getting upset when "check in with me when you shag someone new" was done after the event rather than before are not that different to one person getting upset because "a few drinks after work" should not imply rolling in at 3am completely drunk.
Ok, poly gives you a few new and creative ways to misunderstand and cock up - or be malicious and cause drama - but strictly mono couples still manage to have very similar issues.
If anyone's been following the recent discussion on the Polyamory comm, am I barking up the wrong tree? What is it about "I prefer open/multiple relationships" that newbies need educating about (according to some)? (Ok, if you're into orgies, there's some etiquette there.) Is it because some people are so immersed in their alt.sex environment that they forget that these kinds of issues are well-nigh universal? Or is there some glaring point of difference that I'm missing?
