Hah, I'm not *that* easily pigeonholed

[trixtah]

Ganked from kinzokutaka. I'm not going to paste the whole blurb about the "Five Love Languages", which is some "psychology guru's" pop-science way of describing the differing communication styles we use in relationships, but it's interesting food for thought.

Does anyone really think that gifts are a measure of someone's love for them? Ok, it's really nice to get them, especially when they're thoughtful ones, but as proof of someone's feelings? Hm.

The survey link is here.

And, yes, FWIW, I do think that quality time is the most important thing that someone can give me.

The Five Love Languages

Your primary love language is probably
Quality Time
with a secondary love language being
Acts of Service.

Complete set of results

Quality Time:		9
Acts of Service:		7
Physical Touch:		7
Words of Affirmation:		7
Receiving Gifts:		0

Comments

[trixtah.livejournal.com]

Blech, I'm glad the online test was recast appropriately. The author's website is a whole bunch of psychobabble as well - I wonder if it's being marketed towards Christians, because that's what it looks like - and I didn't get far reading through it. Still, at least we can glean the useful insights and not take on the rest of the rubbish.

[surelars.livejournal.com]

Yep. Even though it can be hard to ignore the stereotyping and gender-normative stuff in books like that, it's sometimes worth it. Despite the rubbish, there's often real insights inside. I'm getting better at not letting my anger at the stoopid stuff get in the way of getting what benefit might be there.

Of course, with a bit of luck someone else will read it and extract the useful bits for us.

[surelars.livejournal.com]

OK, so I sat down and read the book yesterday. It is indeed written for Christian and very traditional (err, old-fashioned) people. That and some heavy-handed pop-psych made it a not terribly exciting read. Some of it felt to me like I fell into a time-warp; the marriages described sounded like something my mother would describe from the '50s. I was genuinely surprised to see that it's actually written in the '90s.

It's a quick read, though, and I picked up some useful bits along the way, so it's not a complete waste of time. However, the online test and a two-page summary would do nicely.

I was surprised that I didn't get angry or frustrated with all the Christian babbling. If anything, I found it a bit amusing and curious. Speaks volumes about how I have changed in the past years.

I also re-read the print edition of the test. It's bad. Yuck. Example: one of the "acts of service" questions reads in the male test "I like it when my spouse does my laundry", and in the female test "I like it when my spouse helps with the laundry". Feh.